


The Meaning of Things

by hazelNuts



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, M/M, Misunderstandings, Or Rather: Bad Communication, POV Simon, Past Clary Fray/Jace Wayland, Past Maia Roberts/Jace Wayland - Freeform, Simon Lewis & Maia Roberts Friendship, jace is bad at Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 06:58:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15137645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazelNuts/pseuds/hazelNuts
Summary: Jace and Simon have a thing. At least, Simon thought it was a thing until he sees Jace flirting with someone else.





	The Meaning of Things

**Author's Note:**

> If you think I forgot any tags, please let me know in the comments.

Simon closes the door to the boathouse behind him, head spinning and chest tight. _How could he have been so stupid? Why did he think that he would be any different from any of the others?_ He slides down to the floor and hugs his knees to his chest. Just another Tuesday, and another broken heart.

He closes his eyes, but the image of Jace flirting with that girl, leaning in close and whispering something in her ear, making her laugh, becomes even more vivid.

This wasn’t how tonight was supposed to go; he wasn’t even supposed to be near the Hunter’s Moon, but Maia had a book that might help him with his paper. He was just going to meet her at the start of her shift, pick up the book, maybe have a glass of O-neg, then go back home to write that damn paper. Everything went to shit when he put his hand on the door, looked up, and saw Jace through the window, in that corner, with that girl.

Simon presses a hand to his chest at the memory, gasping for breath. He doesn’t even need to breathe. _Is this what being staked feels like?_

He’d frozen with his hand on the doorknob. Maia said something, but his ears were ringing. He hadn’t even noticed her walking up to him. And then he ran. He ran as fast as he could, back to the boathouse.

He should’ve seen it coming. He and Jace have never done anything together that didn’t involve a bed, or a chair, or the floor, one time the wall, and very little clothes. They talked, after, watched a movie, but they didn’t go on dates. Jace has never even stayed the night. Simon drags his fingers through his hair, pressing his forehead to his knees. _How could he have been so blind?_

‘Simon?’

Simon jumps up and throws open the door. He didn’t have a plan for what to say, his words usually just pour out, but at the sight of Jace, standing on the other side of the door, a dark stain on his shirt that spreads from his stomach down to the top of his jeans, the words refuse to come. For a second, Simon thinks the dark stain might be blood and he tries to remember where the first-aid kit is, then he smells the stale beer. He wrinkles his nose.

‘Why did Maia throw beer in my lap?’ Jace asks, gesturing at his wet shirt and jeans. ‘Accompanied by the words “this is for Simon”.’

Simon can’t help the smile that tugs at his lips. Maia is an awesome friend.

‘I think it might have something to do with the girl who was practically crawling into your lap,’ Simon says, crossing his arms over his chest.

Jace frowns, his eyes searching Simon’s face.

‘Look,’ Simon sighs. ‘Obviously there’s been some miscommunication about what we were doing.’

Jace’s frown deepens, and there’s a blip in his heartbeat.

‘And I may have communicated that miscommunication to Maia,’ Simon finishes. He looks away from Jace’s now shell-shocked expression. ‘I’ll call her later to fix it so you won’t get beer thrown in your face every time you walk into the Hunter’s Moon.’

Jace is completely silent, so Simon figures that’s it. This is the end of his three weeks of… _something_ with Jace. His hand is on the door to close it when Jace splutters, ‘I– But we–‘

Simon looks up. Jace’s jaw is working, his heart is pounding unevenly; there’s no sign of his usual bravado. He looks down at his feet, obviously struggling with his words, and Simon has no intention of helping him. ‘But it didn’t mean anything,’ Jace finally says.

Simon had expected the words, but they still feel like a slap in the face. He takes a step back. He closes his eyes, hoping to dispel the dizziness caused by those four words bouncing around in his head.

‘Did it?’ The words sound small, and when Simon opens his eyes and looks at Jace, he looks even smaller.

Those four little words stick to a memory. Clary saying “It didn’t mean anything” after the kiss in the Seelie court. Maia saying “It didn’t mean anything” after she told Simon she’d slept with Jace. Jace’s entire love life seems to be made of one-night stands and weekend flings, and “it didn’t mean anything”s. Simon’s chest tightens again, but for a completely different reason. He looks into Jace’s eyes, so scared and uncertain.

He clears his throat to make sure his voice is steady and clear when he says, ‘It means something.’

The words don’t have the effect he hoped for. Jace looks devastated.

‘Simon, I’m so sorry.’ The words sound almost broken. Jace reaches for him, but then snatches his hand back. ‘I just–‘ He laughs bitterly. ‘I have no idea what to do right now. How to make this up to you.’

‘Just, tell me, does this, us, mean something to you?’ Simon asks.

Jace nods. It’s small and quick, and Simon would’ve called it terse if it wasn’t for the hope written all over his face.

‘Well, then,’ Simon says, smiling. ‘Let’s start with an actual date.’

‘Now?’

Simon shakes his head. ‘I’m working on a paper. Some of us still go to school.’

‘Right.’ Jace looks down at his feet, then he takes a step towards Simon so they’re almost toe-to-toe. He gently takes Simon’s hand in his. When he looks up again, he there’s a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. ‘I could keep you company?’ he suggests.

‘Not in that shirt, you’re not.’ Simon wrinkles his nose and plucks at Jace’s shirt. ‘Come on, you can clean up inside, and borrow something of mine.’

Jace lets himself be led into the boathouse and shoved into the bathroom. Simon grabs a set of clothes from his dresser, and leaves them outside the bathroom door. Listening to the running water with half an ear, he installs himself on his bed, and organizes his books, pens and notepads around him, his laptop in his lap. He’s just found where he left off earlier, when Jace walks out of the bathroom and awkwardly stands beside the bed.

‘I didn’t sleep with anyone else,’ he blurts out. ‘I was just flirting with her because…’

‘Because you’re terrible at feelings and don’t know how to deal with them properly,’ Simon finishes for him.

‘Hey! I’m getting better,’ Jace protests, then he huffs out laugh. He clambers onto the bed next to Simon. ‘So, now what?’ he asks.

‘You find some way to entertain yourself while I work on this?’ Simon suggests, waving towards his laptop. He glances at Jace, who smirks, and Simon quickly adds, ‘You find a way to entertain yourself that _doesn_ _’t_ distract me.’

Jace pouts, but he slides off the bed to rummage through Simon’s books. He picks one, then drops back onto the bed, on his stomach. Simon thinks of telling Jace that his ass is distracting him, but he doubts it will do him any good, so with a little extra willpower, he focusses on his paper.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://fandom-madnessess.tumblr.com/).


End file.
